Cullen's Gone Crazy
by AliceCullenIsMyIdol
Summary: what would happen on an instant messanger with the Cullens? Why is Edward so cranky? What is wrong with Emmett?
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing…twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer….I only own the idea and the names.**_

_**Cullen's gone crazy chapter 1- Emmett's Obsessions**_

_**Edward- 48**_

_**Alice- Sister pyschic23**_

_**Emmett-Imaflirt101**_

_**Rosalie-TheBestDamnThing**_

_**66**_

_**Esme-MotherlyVampire3456**_

_**Bella-ClumsyHuman43**_

_**Jacob-Sexywerewolf236**_

_**Nessie-SparkleyHuman01**_

_**Jasper-EmotionalOutcast**_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed in_

_**EmotionalOutcast: I feel so un-loved**__****_

_**Hey! I know!..i'll just sing to pass the time….I can't control myself, cuz I don't know how ,and they love me for it honestly I'll be here for awhile. So give them blood, blood gallons of the stuff, give them all that they can drink but it will never be enough, so give them blood, blood, bloooo-**_

_**Sisterpsychic23:What r u doing?**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: well I wasn't singing blood if that's what u were thinking…..**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: well I wasn't..but now I think that u were**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: damn..fine ..i WAS..happy now?**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: wow..i wish that Edward would be this easy to crack…lol**_

_Imaflirt101 has signed in_

_**EmotionalOutacst: heyyyyyy ...wazzzup??**_

_**Imaflirt101: n2m man…how r things going in relationship city?**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: wtf? Oh…uhhh fine..i think..Alice honey? How are things with us?**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: I feel hurt that YOU of all people are asking me **_

_**how things are going between us..if you must know **_

_**Emmett..everything's fine thank-you. Oh and make sure u don't ask jasper again…he probably won't know.**_

_**Imaflirt101: kewl**_

_**EmotionalOutcast:Hey!!!! I'm not that bad!!**_

_**Imaflirt101: I LIKE WAFFLES!!!!**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: Ok?**_

_48 has signed in_

_**Sisterpsychic23: hey Edward how r ya?**_

_**48: I'm fine…Alice do u have to ask that EVERYTIME we sign in? It's really annoying.**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: well excuse me for being nice. and if it's annoying..good! that means I'm doing my job as a sister.**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: don't worry man..she's mad at me too!.....speaking of which..i'm gonna go now before I do anything else to make her madder….bye guys!**_

_**Edward and Emmett: bye man…..by the way….run!!!!! Alice has a base-ball bat!!!!!**_

_**Siterpsychic23: oh no! r not getting off that easy!!**_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed out_

_**Sisterpsychic23: ohhh he's sooo dead now…oh and I'll be back for you guys later;)**_

_Sisterpsychic23 has signed out_

_**48: wow that was really akward…**_

_**Imaflirt101: yeah….but on the plus side…NO CHICKS!!!! **_

_**48: true dat my brother!**_

_**Imaflirt101: I LIKE WAFFLES**_

_**48:uhh Emmett..u can't even eat waffles..how can u actually like them?**_

_**Imaflirt101: duh1 I know that I can't eat them…but Carlisle looks really funny while he's covered in waffles and syrup…..he smells gross!! Lol**_

_**48: oh no! please tell me u didn't….oh no! u did?!?!?! If anyone asks..i had NOTHING to do with this!!!!!!!!**_

_**Imaflirt101: of course u didn't..it was me and jasper…ur wayyyyyy too nice for that kind of thing…!**_

_Sexywerewolf236 has signed in_

_**Sexywerewolf236: too nice to do what?**_

_**Imaflirt101: dump waffles and syrup on Carlisle**_

_**Sexywerewolf236; that was so much fun..it was hilarious!!!**_

_**48: oh my Carlisle…Jacob helped you….?mutt**_

_**Imaflirt101: 'course…by the way….I LIKE WAFFLES **_

_**Sexywerewofl236: we don't care ..shut up!**_

_**Imaflirt101: ur mean..but waffles rock!**_

_**48: for once I agree with the mutt..SHUT UP!!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: hey! I am not a mutt!!!..i am ur son-in-law!!!**_

_**48: no ur not….and u never will be**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: ahaha but u see Edward..i already am….cuz I'm sleeping with ur daughter..*in a weird darth vador voice* "Edward I am ur son"**_

_**Imaflirt101: wtf?**_

_**48: that doesn't even deserve a comment**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: oh! But that already is a comment..OWNED BY TECHNICALITY!!!!!!hahahahaha**_

_**Imaflirt101: oh shut up! Nobody cares!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: oh but Edward will…cuz I have his Volvo..and Bella…..and I'm sleeping with his daughter!!!!**_

_**48: if u have my Volvo..ur sooo gonna die**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: wow! More worried about his car than about his wife**_

_**Imaflirt101: oh snap! He's got u there**_

_**48: I'm more worried about my car only cuz HE has it..and Bella van look after herself..she's a lot stronger than he is.**_

_**Imaflirt101: this is true….GO GET UR FREAKING CAR….oh and u get me some more waffles while ur out?**_

_**48:…uhhh I guess so..oh and Jacob..if u actually HAVE my car..u will die the most painful death I can come up with ok?**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: sounds fair :P**_

_**48: meh!**_

_48 has signed off_

_**Sexywereolf236: that was sooo funny!**_

_**Imaflirt101: do u actually have his car?**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: of course not..well yes I took it if that's what u mean..but I put it in mike newton's garage!**_

_**Imaflirt101: wow! that's pure genius!**_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed in_

_**Imaflirt101: hey man……how's Alice?**_

_**EmotionalOutcast; she CAN'T know I'm here…I've been running from her all freaking morning!!!!**_

_**Sexywerwolf236: wow tough break….doesn't Carlisle look funny with waffles on his head!?**_

_**EmtionalOutcast: you mean he hasn't washed it off yet?**_

_**Imaflirt101: nope..he's been looking for us…u know to yell at us…the he will go and wash it off!**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: ur kidding!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: no he's not..it's hilarious**_

_**Imaflirt101: oh Jasper! We were just discussing Jacob's latest evil plan..!**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: oh really? And what might that be?**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: I stole Edward's Volvo and put it in Mike Newton's garage!!!!**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: wow that my friend is pure genius!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: I've been told that!!**_

_**EmotionalOutacst: lol**_

_**Imaflirt101: rofl**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: lmao**_

_66 has signed_

_**Everyone but Carlisle: oh no!!!! RUN!!!!!**_

_**66: you guys are in so much trouble!!!! Do you think this is funny?!?!?!..don't answer that!! Esme won't even come in 10 feet of me because I smell disgusting.**_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed off_

_Sexywerewolf236 has signed off_

_Imaflirt101 has signed off_

_**: They are sooooo grounded when I find them again!!!!..ugh! but for now..i'm gonna go take a shower and get these waffles off of me!**_

_66 has signed off_

_**So what did u think? Don't worry everyone else will come in the next chapter….Also if ur wondering. Alice does forgive Jasper and does stop trying to kill him….just so ur aware…the next chapter will be really random. Bella's name is gonna change so don't worry. Review please!**_

_**AliceCullenIsMyIdol**_


	2. Jacob is in trouble

_**Cullen's gone crazy chapter 2-Jacob is in trouble**_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing….*tear..anyhoo on with the story. By the way all the names will stay the same..well except Bella's.**_

_Sisterpsychic23 has signed in_

_48 has signed in_

_ClumsyHuman43 has signed in_

_**Sisterpsychic23: hey guys, how r ya?**_

_**ClumsyHuman43: I'm good..kinda bored though**_

_**48: same…hey Bella?**_

_**ClumsyHuman43: yea Edward?**_

_**48: why is your name clumsy human?...you're not clumsy. Or human anymore.**_

_**ClumsyHuman43: oh shoot! You're right…one sec.**_

_ClumsyHuman43 has signed off_

_**Sisterpsychic23: wow..that was akward!**_

_**48: how so?**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: as if u don't know :P**_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed in_

_**Sisterpsychihc23: hey hun**_

_**EmotionalOutcast: hi..uhh baby? Can u tone down the excitement? It's really strong right now!**_

_**Sisterpsychic23: oh sorry**_

_**48: GET A ROOM!!**_

_Sisterpyschic23 has signed off_

_EmotionalOutcast has signed off_

_**48: guys that's nasty!!!!! Oh man…not in my c- oh never mind!**_

_Sexywerewolf236 has signed in_

_**48: oh hell no! I'm leaving right now!!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: why? Do u hate me that much?**_

_**48: yes**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: why????**_

_**48: cuz ur sleeping with my daughter!!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: well that's a good reason..i think**_

_**48: u actually think..wow**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: that's mean **__****_

_**48: oh I know ;)**_

_Whysoserious has signed in_

_**Sexywerewolf236: hey Bells**_

_**48: hi love**_

_**Whysoserious?: hey guys what did I miss?**_

_**48: oh nothing too important..**_

_**Whysoserious?: why do I not believe that?**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: cuz Edward is a total STICK IN THE MUD….yea I went there**_

_**48: I'm a stick in the mud? Wtf?**_

_SparkleyHuman01 has signed in_

_**Whysoserious: hey sweetie**_

_**SparkleyHuman01: hey mom, dad, Jake**_

_**48: hey**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: hey ness! Did u hear from Emily lately?**_

_**SparkleyHuman01: no why?**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: just wondering**_

_**48: actually he was hoping u didn't talk to Emily..only cuz she knows what the pack did today….and since the dog won't tell u..i will..first the pack went on a major sugar rush….then they went panty-raiding. Then they egged Jared's house (no Jared wasn't with them)**_

_**Then they tp'd Seth and Leah's place.**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: gee thanks so much**_

_**48: anytime ;)**_

_**SparkleyHuman01: YOU DID WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!**_

_**Sexywerewolf236: uhh…what was that Sam? U need me to watch the southern end? Ok I'll be right there!**_

_Sexywerewolf236 has signed off_

_**SparkleyHuman01: mom, dad is it ok if I kill Jake?**_

_**48: can I help?**_

_**SparkleyHuman01: no he's MINE!.....by the way mom..where is the base-ball bat?**_

_**48: ask Alice**_

_**SparkleyHuman01: ok……..bye guys**_

_SparkleyHuman01 has signed off_

_Imaflirt101 has signed in_

_TheBestDamnThing has signed in_

_**48:hey guys**_

_**Whysoserious?: hi Emmett, rose how r u guys?**_

_**Imafllirt101: good…guess what?**_

_**Everyone but Emmett: what?**_

_**Imaflirt101: I LIKE WAFFLES**_

_**TheBestDamnThing; idiot *slaps Emmett***_

_**Whysoserious?: ok then **_

_**48: yes sir!!waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit..not Carlisle again?**_

_**Imaflirt101: no..Esme**_

_**48: yes sir, yes sir…who helped this time….?**_

_**Imaflirt101: same as last time**_

_**Whysoserious?: hey rose? R u following any of this?**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: nope**_

_**48: uh-oh Jacob's in enough trouble already..he is so sleeping at Quil's tonight!!**_

_**Imaflirt101: exactly..that's the point!**_

_**48: that my brother is pure genius!**_

_**Imaflirt101: speaking of which..u never did tell me…..did u find ur car?**_

_**48: yea..in MIKE NEWTON'S FREAKING GARAGE…and do u wanna know what was written on it? Well I don't care cuz I'm gonna tell u anyway… "Werewolves rock" was written ALL over it..i spent six and a half hours scrubbing my freaking car!!!!!!!!!!**_

_**Imaflirt101: hahahahahahahahahahah**_

_**48:YOU KNEW?!?!?!?!**_

_**Imaflirt101: 'course**_

_**48: u had better to be able to run faster scared then I can angry..and since I'm ur brother I'll be nice and give u a 10 second head start…ready?**_

_**Imaflirt101: I'm not scared of u eddie –kins:P**_

_**48: 1..2…..10!**_

_48 has signed off_

_**Imaflirt101: ohh scary!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH EDWARD STOP IT!!!!I DIDN'T MEAN TOO….IT WAS JASPER AND JACOB AHHHHHHHHHHHHH PLEASE EDWARD STOP!!!!!!**_

_48 has signed in_

_**Whysoserious?: what did u do?**_

_**48: I just hit him where it hurts!**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: did u burn all of it?**_

_**48: yep**_

_**Whysoserious?:all of what?**_

_**48: all of Emmett's Hannah Montana stuff**_

_**Imaflirt101:I WILL AVENGE U HANNAH!!!!!!!!!!I PROMISE!!!!!**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: oh c'mon Hun..it can't be that bad**_

_**Imaflirt101: yes it can **__****_

_**TheBestDamnThing: ok how 'bout this we'll go and buy u some new stuff ok?**_

_**Imaflirt101: really?**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: sure**_

_**Imaflirt101: thanks rose..i love ya**_

_Imaflirt101 has signed off_

_**Whysoserious?: Are u really gonna get him new stuff?**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: of course not…his obsessions with Hannah Montana are really creepy..i should go and make sure he hasn't already left…bye guys**_

_**48: bye**_

_**Whysoserious?: bye rosie!**_

_**TheBestDamnThing: only Alice can call me Rosie!**_

_TheBestDamnThing has signed off_

_**48: well love I guess it's just u and me**_

_**Whysoserious?:nah! It's just u**_

_Whysoserious? has signed off_

_**48: no way! No freaking way!!**_

_48 has signed off_

_**So what did u think? I'm a little stumped on what I should do the next chapter on..or hould it be random..like this one? I don't know..give me some idea's si vous plais..or please if u speak English. Review!**_


End file.
